Read below to see our wonderful relationship experts Rhiannon and Morrighan tackle a touchy subject: Bromances.

Bromances. These curious relationship specimen; part friendship, part respect, part deep understanding, part love even, are not uncommon in our moderately liberal public school and yet they are confusing and, as a result, are often misunderstood. So, decoding bromances it is!

Perceived from the outside to symbolize the relationship between two gay guys that simply have not come out yet, bromances in fact stress the complete opposite. Although two guys who are prone to backslapping, poking, and sometimes hugging one another, and are often sensitive to each other’s moods may make a bromance seem like an actual romance with a male twist, don’t be fooled. Bromances are strictly platonic within themselves, these guys are just very close friends who truly understand each other, but are not interested in each other in a sexual or romantic way. My own boyfriend has a long-standing bromance of his own and both he and his partner bromancer agree that while from the outside theirs may seem like a romantic pairing, between them there is simply strong friendship. Bromances, then, provide a happy parallel to a girl’s BFF, keeping the idea of a close friendship open to anyone of either gender, without having to pull into play the ever-awkward sexual card.

So a note to the homophobes, rejoice! Your best guy friend is nothing more than that, even if he does pat you on the back and offer to pay for food if you go out. If you are in a happy bromance, good for you. Keep your friend close, but don’t forget that there are others who also want some of your attention, especially if they’re dating you. For people jilted by bromances that seem to consume most of your significant other’s time, breathe. Let the boys be boys and if he’s smart, he’ll know to pay as much attention to you as he does to his friend. If he’s not smart, spell it out for him firmly that you’d like more of his time, and if he still doesn’t get it, then I wish you both the best of luck. To people still weirded out by bromances, that’s alright. It’s an interesting concept to think about, and if you can, don’t be afraid to try it out. To all the other people not in the above categories, I wish you lots of your favorite food, an extra hour of sleep, and a magical no-homework day.

-All the best

Rhiannon

“Bromances.” What a classy term the vernacular has produced. A fusion of “brother,” and “romance,” this quaint little word has generated quite the vehicle of debate. Is this term the male equivalent of “bff?” Is it hinting at homosexual undertones? Time will tell if the word is to become widely accepted, or if Madame Fate has other plans. Woe is the tale of Julian and his “Bromeo!”

Thought-provoking introduction aside, the bromance has weaseled its way into many an adolescent American’s vocabulary. Those gals subjected to their beau’s extra appendage are lucky indeed– I happen to be one of those lucky ones. My significant other has long had another “blondie” in his life, and I cannot help but feel envious when seeing them together. Though I like this “other blondie,” I often find myself pondering the peculiar power he holds over my beloved. Why must they engage in such frivolous back-slapping and witty banter without me? There are probably other women out there who face the same predicament; it’s hardly abnormal. While Rhiannon has covered the more technical aspects of the subject, I am here to provide some advice on the matter. Don’t feel obligated to take this advice to heart, as I am just here to shine my glorious light on the subject. Now the information I am about to divulge may just happen to blow your brain into lovely little gelatinous chunks. Are you ready? Sit down, take a few deep breaths, and brace yourself. My advice for those suffering the affliction is… to simply ride with it. The bromance is an unshakable bond that you will be better off embracing than questioning. A radical notion, I realize, but us gals have got to let some things lie. How to deal with such a curse, you ask? Speak with your lover, illuminate him– tell him how this bromantic relationship makes you feel. Who knows, maybe even guilt would work.

We are all human, and savor the answers life may toss us now and then, but the nature of the power the bromance holds is a mystery best left unsolved. Let dead men lie. Don’t reanimate their corpses and question them.

-Morrighan

It started out not knowing if I should take off my shoes before I entered the house, or when I was over the threshold, and then progressed to wondering if he celebrated Christmas or New Years on the same day as my family did. Interracial relationships however, are common and very fun. The notions you may have had of a certain culture soon get dispelled and often a whole new world opens up.

Sometimes the racial differences between yourself and the person you care for seem daunting. Maybe you do not celebrate the same holidays or eat the same food. Maybe even the languages you speak at home are different. It can be really hard to connect with a person who has never experienced many of the things you grew up knowing, such as cultural cuisine or even just a favorite television show that only runs on Telemundo, and hence in Spanish. There are tons of other differences that can also crop up that are not initially noticeable. Saying ‘I love you’ openly and hugging someone in front of their parents could cause tension because it is unusual for your significant other, but not for you. The stress from having to bridge so many gaps in your cultural knowledge can feel overwhelming and as result the relationships fracture or stagnate.

Stress not though, because for every thing that seems to be a barrier, you will find something you have in common. The relationship is like a layer cake. Initially you were attracted because of some similarities, a common class or sport or club. This is a familiar, safe layer which leads you to flirt and perhaps even begin dating. The second layer down is the filling. You get to know the person better, their tastes, their family, differences between the pair of you become apparent. Personally, the filling of a cake is always a surprise, sometimes I end up loving it and sometimes I can not bear to eat it to get to the next layer. Both reactions are fine, but I have learned to give a new flavor a chance, savor it for a while, because snap decisions, rejection or acceptance, can be very misleading.

Below the first layer and below the filling, there is the final layer where deeper similarities some to light. If you have stuck together with someone, dealt with the aspects of your worlds that are different, and are still together then there are other, more powerful similarities that bind you and will keep you together. The meat of a story is in its plot and characters, not so much the setting. In the same way, a relationship is a story that takes place between you and your significant other; the differences between your races are just the setting, the background, and not the determining factors in your story. In this third cake layer there are continents of common ground, sometimes you just need to sail uncharted waters to find them.

Good luck with everything and may sunny skies find you, or the pair of you as it may be.

Rhiannon

Interracial relationships no longer elicit the gasps and screams to which former generations have become accustomed. Instead, most people find the concept commonplace, and embrace it freely. No, the real reluctance is often derived from the pressure exerted by friends and family. The magnificent Morrighan can relate. This is her experience.

Picture a household where rice cookers, chopsticks, and oriental tapestries catch you at every turn. (Considering the demographics of Mills High School, this shouldn’t be too difficult, I hope.) I enter the household, and am subjected to the removal of my shoes. I turn a corner, and the father of my significant other–a master of at least five different martial arts–is practicing his awesome sword techniques at a rather uncomfortable proximity. After a final cleave, he greets me with a handsome smile and  “hello” in his thick and choppy accent. Different ways of life have always fascinated me, but I can’t say the same for my family. I come from roots comprised of a WASP father and some very traditional Italians. (No, they are nothing like those fools on Jersey Shore.) Needless to say, this culture clash brings up some interesting… ”sentiments” from my mother’s side. My significant other is six-foot two and half Vietnamese. He currently resides with his very Vietnamese father. Ever since I introduced my love to my five-foot four, very Italian grandparents, the Italian Inquisition has been ceaseless–six months ceaseless. The first question they ask, of course? “E’ italiano?” Luckily, I could respond with the affirmative, but the fact that he had any Asian mixed into his genes raised eyebrows.

My grandparents are quite accepting considering their ascetic moral background, but other family members haven’t really “granted their approval” quite yet. My advice for those suffering the same affliction? Try explaining to them the nature of the twenty-first century, and the fact that just because your significant other isn’t, *insert heritage here*, he or she is still human. If that doesn’t work, I would highly recommend beating said family members senseless, or finding a gypsy to curse them for their ignorance and extreme mental retardation. As delightful as these sound, perhaps they aren’t the most humane solutions. So if there is neither a baseball bat or gypsy at your disposal, use diplomacy. Explain just how much your beloved means to you, and you to your beloved. Explain that, no matter the culture, race, or religion to which your significant other belongs, he or she is equally as capable of loving you as much as anyone else. If that doesn’t work, please let me know and I would be elated to arrange a very enlightening counseling session for the ignorant in your life–full of magic and wonder… and ritual sacrifice.

-Morrighan